I still remember my parents coming into my bedroom at night before they would go to bed as they could hear me awake and I would be doing sit ups in my bedroom in the dark just so I could look that bit better and even skinner than I already was. My weight has always been an insecurity to me. I was absolutely starving every second of the day! I have always been a big eater but always managed with my big appetite to stay quite thin but now I was not only eating constantly but I was also gaining weight with it yet I just couldn’t control how hungry I was. Trying to look after the girls, not to mention two demanding kids on the spectrum, while personally deteriorating so fast was becoming increasingly difficult to do.Īfter about a month of fighting myself to stay awake all day, I then started to experience extreme hunger. This started off just having a bad day here and there, to in a very short period of time becoming a daily struggle. It was like my arms and legs had decided they were giving up on me. A feeling as though I can only explain as being semi paralysed, I couldn’t lift my limbs. Next came the most unusual feelings in my body. Even when we didn’t think I could push through anymore. Its funny how before kids we really take advantage of when we aren’t feeling well to lay on the couch as long as needed to recover but with kids theres this extra push to ensure they are fed, dressed and ready for each day. This then affected my dizziness again as I mentioned previously, exhaustion exacerbated my dizziness and this exhaustion was a level I had never experienced. I was barely able to drive a car because I was unable to concentrate, not to mention that my eyes couldn’t see what was in front of me. I was beginning to think that I needed new glasses as maybe my eyes were deteriorating at a rapid rate. It was as though I had never slept and my brain couldn’t function.
I could barely see and every bit of light or change of scenery seemed to set them off. I couldn’t bring myself to get off the couch to look after myself each day, let alone looking after the kids. My eyes also became affected with it. Different symptoms seemed to be popping up left right and centre. It was like I was fine one day and sick the next, it seemed to happen that fast. Very quickly my health started deteriorating. This is when things started to become worse than I was already experiencing. We had outgrown it and moved in and rented my brother and sister in laws house until we found our next home. Asha by now was 4 and Phoenix 2 and we had just sold our house.
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